How To Deal With TOXIC PEOPLE In A Spiritual Way! [3 Powerful Steps]

How To Deal With TOXIC PEOPLE In A Spiritual Way! [3 Powerful Steps]

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00:01
so many of us struggle with toxic people in our lives and have no idea what to do about it a toxic person can not only ruin your day but they can also create significant challenges in your life on a regular basis but how do we deal with toxic people especially when they're in our family or friends in this video you're going to learn what a toxic person is from a spiritual and energy perspective then we're going to go over if toxic people can change or not then the one key lesson that a toxic person is presenting to you that you really need to learn and then in part four of
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the video we're going to go over a three-step process to help you deal with toxic people when they do enter your life coming up hello beautiful soul this is christina lopes the heart alchemist here to help you open your heart heal your past and live with purpose if you're new to my videos click on that subscribe button and also on the bell so you get notified as soon as i publish new content and don't forget to follow me over on instagram where i share weekly tips and advice that you won't find here on youtube
01:04
and before we jump into the meat of this video i wanted to let you know that we've added a supplemental workbook it's a free resource for this video it has some key takeaways and some homework questions to help you go deeper on the content that we discuss in this video i'll leave a link to that free workbook in the description box below so you can download it after watching this video on to part one of the video what's a toxic person so let's go over the kind of the mainstream definition of what a toxic person is and then we'll get we'll go deeper into the spiritual and energy aspect of it
01:34
so in general a toxic person is someone whose behavior negatively impacts your life that's the easiest way to look at a toxic person that that person really negatively impacts your life there's a word that comes through when we're talking about negative people and it's the word heaviness that's another word that's very pertinent and it heaviness means that they just add heaviness to your life they add heaviness to your day they add heaviness when you when you interact with them so the word heaviness comes through a lot when
02:04
we talk about toxic people they really they come in and they just add heaviness to your life now the issue with toxic people is that for so many of us they're present in our families in our friendship circles uh in our jobs our co-workers some of our co-workers so sometimes it could be a little bit more complex to to to kind of deal and interact with negative people when they're in situations that we can't exactly get out of all right so that's kind of the overview of what a toxic person is but now i want to go a little bit deeper
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so that we understand uh toxic people more from an energy perspective so when it comes to toxic people there are a couple of energy things that are going on with them that really contribute to them being toxic people in the first place the first energy issue is that they have generally very negative outlooks so they they see life and themselves in a really negative way um they think negatively they're considered a lot of times debbie downers if you've ever heard of that term a debbie downer is someone who's just
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always seeing the negative aspect of life and so what happens is the more negative their outlook is the more their vibration comes down and that's where then we pick up on the heaviness of that of that of that toxic person because their vibration keeps coming down because they have such a negative outlook the more your vibration comes down the harder it is for you to be around other people who have higher vibrations because it just doesn't feel good the energy interaction doesn't feel good right so so that's the first energy issue they
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have going on the second one that they have going on is that they have what's known as a vacuum energy field i call this a vacuum energy field and let me explain what this what this means so normally your energy field so your energy field is kind of an egg shaped um uh quantum non-physical field that that is around your body that encases your body that energy field is constantly communicating with the universe in and out it dances with the universe so energy goes in energy goes out
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and it's constantly moving in a harmonious way it's dancing with the universe in and out and in and out when it comes to toxic people they have what's known as a vacuum energy field which means that they because they they have very negative outlook because their energy comes down a lot they're not generating energy within themselves and so what ends up happening is their energy field is constantly sucking energy from the outside there's an imbalance in energy there's no harmony
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meaning that toxic people they siphon energy from the outside like a vacuum constantly sucking in energy and they give out very little so there's an imbalance there's a lot of sucking in of energy on their part and not a lot of giving of energy this is why a lot of times toxic people are nearly impossible to be around because they're constantly sucking your energy and they're not giving you anything in return so there's an energy imbalance there's not harmony in that and it's because they have this energy field that's constantly sucking in energy it's constantly
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siphoning energy because there's an imbalance in this energy field a lot having to do with them having such a negative outlook on life that it brings their vibration out so they start to feel without energy and they start to kind of bring it in siphoning it from the outside environment there's no balance there and these two key energy issues are the reason why toxic people are nearly impossible to be around especially when you when you haven't trained yourself they're nearly impossible to be around because you feel
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drained you feel tired when you're around them you feel horrible and it's because they're just sucking your energy and they're not giving anything in return okay so here's a better understanding on an energy level what's going on with a toxic person and what makes them toxic in the first place so now that you know these these two energy quirks that kind of make a toxic person a toxic person and you understand more of what's going on energetically let's go over some key traits of a toxic person just in case you're wondering if you have any present in your life most of us can catch them quickly but
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sometimes you know we may not catch that that person is in fact toxic because maybe we've just been dealing with them our whole lives if their family members are friends we we don't really catch that there's toxicity in that energy so i want to go over some key features uh five i'm going to give you five traits of a toxic person so you can get better at catching them if if you're if you're unsure whether a person in your life is toxic or not so the first trait is that they're manipulators they're very good at manipulating and
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it's precisely because their energy system is constantly siphoning energy in so they need people to behave in a certain way in order for them to get energy so they're master manipulators they're very good at getting you to do what they want what they want you to do all right so manipulation is a skill that toxic people learn usually unconsciously so toxic people aren't necessarily bad people they're they're not you know they have the same beautiful souls that we have they're all we are all beautiful unique
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eternal beings but they become a person becomes toxic when they get stuck in the human aspect and in the human baggage and then they get stuck in their mind and their egos and they lose the perspective of the soul that's really when you get toxic you're not toxic when you're connected to your soul truth all right so so this this being a manipulator very common with a toxic person they are master manipulators and if you're if you've ever been around a toxic person you probably know this the second trait of a toxic person is that they don't respect
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boundaries so a toxic person will literally treat you however they want especially if you let them so they do not respect boundaries they don't understand boundaries they will violate boundaries constantly and it's because they have this vacuuming energy field that's constantly taking energy in they don't care if you have boundaries or not they're going to keep violating those all right so so they don't respect the personal boundaries of other people that's another key trait of a toxic person the third trait of a toxic person is that
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they are very self-centered so constantly talking about themselves constantly you know wanting to to to throw their problems onto you constantly it's just about me me me me me they're very very self-centered and now you can kind of understand why they're self-centered from an energy perspective it's because that energy system is so imbalanced that it's becoming a vacuum all it does is suck energy in right so they're very very centered on aren't only what their problems are they don't want to know about anybody else's
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because that energy system is not harmonized so they don't give they just take very self-centered they only care about their problems they only care about their issues than they and if you have an issue uh you know if this is a friend for example if you have a friend that's a toxic person and you need to talk through something they'll very quickly they'll say oh yeah i'll i'll help you and then they'll listen to you for like one minute and then they'll switch the conversation and start talking about themselves i don't know if this has ever happened to you but it's definitely happened to me and so it's this it's this energy being
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very very self-centered trait number four of a toxic person is that they seek attention so there is a little bit of a continuation of the previous trait they're constantly seeking attention because again that energy system is constantly vacuuming in energy constantly seeking attention a lot of times toxic people can be referred to as drama queens so they're just constantly making drama they're constantly making waves in order to get attention from other people because without that attention they don't have the energy that they need to siphon in order to keep their energy system
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somewhat afloat okay so so they're constantly constantly seeking energy a little bit of what's known as the drama queens the fifth trait of a toxic person the fifth and last trait is that they overpower others so again because of that energy quirk of having that vacuuming energy system that's constantly sucking in energy but doesn't give any energy out that's why they very frequently will overpower others so for example let's say you have a toxic toxic friend and you
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you know they call you they want to go out to coffee they have a problem whatever it is you go out to coffee with them and you sit with them and just in 20 minutes that you're there listening to another one of their dramas they are vacuuming they're siphoning so much energy that by the time you leave that 20-minute coffee conversation you're completely completely drained of energy and that's because they've overpowered your energy system and they just siphoned your energy in the 20 minutes that you were that you were there talking to each other okay so very very
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common that a toxic person will easily overpower someone else energetically on to part two of the video can toxic people change so this one's interesting because a lot of people ask a lot of people you know when we're talking about toxic people there's a lot of negativity also around it so generally um you know in a lot of blogs and videos and and self-help kind of circles usually what's said is that a toxic person is just going to remain the same forever and you just need to cut them out of your life and that's that's how you deal with them
11:17
i don't view things in that way and i think that as as you're developing yourself more you become a little bit more openhearted and have compassion and empathy for everybody and so can a toxic person change of course they can change just like you and me can change everybody can change and so toxic person is no different the issue with any kind of change whether it's in a toxic person or in anyone is that in order for you to change there has to be a level of self-awareness present so for a toxic person to change they
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have to become self-aware that they're toxic in the first place and that they do certain things that are very draining of others that aren't very respectful of others so they have to become aware of this and plus you know bonus bonus points if they become spiritual and they also start to understand the energy aspects of what makes them a toxic person in the first place because when they correct that then everything changes all right so so the ease the the first answer to that question is that yes toxic people can change just like everybody else can but that's
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not up to you that's the second part of the of the answer here is that changing them is not up to you it's up to them the self-awareness has to come from within them it cannot come from you wanting to change them or trying to force them to change all right now there's something interesting that'll happen especially if we're talking about a toxic person that's present in your family and your circle of friends a toxic person that's kind of present in your life that that you have a soul connection to or that you have a more intimate connection with what
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ends up happening is that if you have a toxic person that's closer to you the moment that you change because that's all that we can do we can just change ourselves the moment that you change within you the moment that you change your energy they may change also okay now notice i said they may change and the reason is because we evolve kind of in pods or groups if i change my energy all of the people that i'm energetically connected to i pull them up as i move my energy up so that's a really cool and beautiful way we're all
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helping each other evolve really on a soul level so if i have toxic people around in my life and i change my energy then i'm going to energetically be pulling the strings the energy strings that i have with the people around me i'm going to be pulling them up also so when i change my energy a toxic person may change also but they may not this is this is all you know is going to be different for everyone they may change or they're they may not it's not up to you but the reason that i'm asking you to
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focus on changing yourself is because there's an interesting aspect about toxic people and that is the big lesson that they that they bring you right a toxic person in one way or another the soul of that person is trying to show you they're trying to train you into your power that is the key key lesson that a toxic person comes to to to really teach you in your life when they're present is that a toxic person is teaching you they are training you into your power the more in your power
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you come the less that person will become will be toxic to you so that's kind of the the cool aspect of of learning how to work with toxic people learning how to really come into my power how to understand the lesson that that person is presenting in my life the more that i come into my power the less toxic people will affect me on to part three of the video how to deal with toxic people so as i said before the majority of advice and self-help circles around toxic people
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has just a lot to do with just cutting them out of your life and just you know because toxic people there are no good just cut them out of your life and move on that's generally the advice that's given around you know how to deal with toxic people but i see things a bit differently um one that the the spiritual aspect that if you start to train yourself into your power then the supposed toxic person may not be toxic to you at all anymore it depends on where you are energetically okay so that's one aspect
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but another aspect to this is you may not feasibly be able to cut this person out of your life completely it depends on what relationship you have with this person so for example let's say that you are co-parenting let's say you split up with a toxic x but you have a child with that person and you have to co-parent with them you can't just cut this person out of your life and move on that would be easy but but you know life is a little bit more complicated sometimes so there are times when we can't cut certain toxic people out of our lives for one way
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or for one reason or another so it isn't always black and white the answer isn't always cut them out of your life and move on it's not black and white there's a lot of gray in this and there's a lot of layers in this and so you have to make that decision sometimes it is the best sometimes the best thing to do is to cut a toxic person out of your life and that's it but sometimes it's not the best decision or sometimes it's not even possible just like this example that i gave of someone who's co-parenting with a toxic ex-partner and and you know that person they need to interact with them on some level because they're
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co-parenting right so uh so this is kind of a a nuanced look at all of this i'm going to give you a three-step process on how to deal with toxic people whether you want to keep them in your life or not want to keep them in your life this three-step process is going to help you really learn how to deal with toxic people to a place where they no longer affect you whether they stay in your life or not all right now remember to follow this three-step process in order sometimes i give you tips that you can you can do them out of order but in this
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case this three-step process is to be followed in order because the energy needs to build one step builds on top of each other okay so so let's get into these three steps okay so here's the first step the first step is empowerment all right so i talked about this a little bit already so you probably knew that this was the first step to come in whatever you do with the toxic person whether you cut them out of your life or not the first step and this is crucial is that you must be in your power you must come into your power
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because as i said a little while ago the top lesson that a toxic person comes to show you is the lesson of empowerment they are literally training you into your power that's what a toxic person is doing on a spiritual level and they're doing this because they have a really interesting quirk in them so people who have toxic people they have really strong energy systems okay now this may not seem like this is true but think about it if a toxic person had a weak energy
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system they wouldn't be toxic because they wouldn't affect anyone right like they would not be able to affect or negatively impact other people if their energy system was weak but their energy system is strong and that's why they negatively impact people so much is because they have this strong energy system well if a toxic person with a strong energy system shows up in front of me what are they doing spiritually they are training me into my power if i match their strength energetically or if i
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surpass their strength energetically will they be able to negatively impact my life no they won't they won't they will not be able to negatively impact my life now i could still not want to have them in my life that's true but the point is regardless of what decision you make whether you keep them in your life or not this first step must be trained and that is i have to be in my power the more in my power i am the less this negative person or this toxic person is going to affect my life whether they stay or whether they
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go okay so so empowerment coming into your power taking the invitation of the universe to come into your power when you're in the presence of a toxic person this is so crucial and this is so important because here's here's a little pro tip here uh just just to give you an understanding of what would happen if you didn't focus on this step one so let's say that you were just like ah forget empowerment i don't care i'm just gonna cut them out of my life i'm never talking to them again just cut them out of my life and i'll be done with with toxicity okay
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if you don't focus on empowerment if you don't focus on coming into your power sure you can cut one toxic person out of your life but guess what's going to happen because you live in a resonance-based universe what's going to happen is sooner or later another toxic person is going to come into your life why because your energy system is weak you haven't trained it into power and so what's going to end up happening is you're going to call to you lessons coming in the form of toxic people that are going to come to try and
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challenge you to come into your power you see that's why this first step is crucial regardless of whether you do with that person remember you must come into your power that is a crucial first step without this first step you can't deal with toxic people period now if coming into your power is an issue and you have no idea how to get to a place of self-empowerment i shot a whole video on self-confidence and power i'll leave links in the description box below so you can watch that video it'll really help you come into your power and that'll cover step number
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step number one of this process i'll leave links to that video in the description box below so you can watch after this one now once you start working on this self-empowerment piece and you start to come into your power and and when it comes to you know when we're talking about coming into your power i'm pointing here to my stomach because this is really a work that has a lot to do with the solar plexus is one of your energy chakras it's it's the third chakra in your in in the seven main chakra system so that's this top of the stomach here that's a lot has a lot to do with power and sovereignty
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the more you come into your power a funny thing is going to happen and the funny thing is that you'll have less issues with toxic people just like that just because as soon as you focus on coming into your power the impact that negative people have over you is going to disintegrate because the issue is about nine about 80 or 90 percent of the issues you have with a toxic person is because they are pulling on your energy and they're overpowering you
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if a toxic person cannot overpower you your issues with them sort of start to dissolve they no longer have power over you and that just dissolves the majority of the issues you have with them whether they stay in your life or not okay so so this is amazing and and this is the key the key first step the foundation without which you can't really do anything else about toxic people without having this self-empowerment and power and sovereignty peace in place step number two of the process is to create strong boundaries all right so now that
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you're starting to come into your power you've worked on step number one step number two is you need to create strong boundaries boundaries another way of saying boundaries as boundaries are rules of engagement that you have with people it's rules that you have on how you accept or not accept being treated all right so that's what boundaries are and when it comes to toxic people you need to have strong boundaries you need to have healthy and strong boundaries with everybody not just with toxic people but especially with toxic people especially when you're first learning how to deal with them now when when it comes to setting
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boundaries i want to leave a really important side note because i never want to leave any type of confusion when it has to do with this type of work and that is i'm only talking about having healthy strong boundaries with toxic people but not to the point where there is any kind of abusive situation occurring so i want to leave this important side note if you are in a situation that is abusive physically emotionally if you are in danger in any way if your safety is at risk at any point
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then this this three-step process is not really pertinent at the time because really what you want to do is you want to get out of that situation quickly all right so as soon as you start coming into your power walk out the door that's literally the that's literally the procedure if you're in any type of dangerous situation abusive situation anything like that because there's no you won't be able to create healthy boundaries if you're in that kind of more dangerous situation but that's way beyond a toxic person that we're talking about here we're not talking about that level of
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toxicity okay so i want to leave this important side note that the tips that i'm giving here are not if you are in a specific dangerous situation or an abusive situation in those kinds of situations you just need to walk out you need to leave okay so so i wanted to leave this side note before we continue talking about the boundaries so if you do feel like you're in a more kind of a more severe form of dealing with a toxic person i did shoot a video on what's known as narcissism i shot a video on that and that'll kind
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of help you work through this situation if you're in a situation or a connection with someone that is a little bit above the energy of the toxic person that i'm talking about here so i'll leave links to that to that narcissism video in the description box below so you can watch after watching this video now if you if you're not in a dangerous situation and you're just dealing with a regular toxic person that's not really putting your life at risk or anything like that let's go back to the to the normal toxic person that we were talking about here when it comes to creating boundaries what this means this could mean a
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variety of different different things but basically you are creating the rules of engagement and how you accept to be treated and how you don't accept to be treated so here are some examples you can for example have a difficult conversation with that toxic person where you sit down with them and you say you know i will no longer accept this kind of interaction between you and i so something has to change otherwise i won't be able to keep you in my life so you may have to have uh um difficult conversations for sure a lot of difficult conversations may need to be had
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um you're also gonna you may also communicate to that person what your expectations are when it comes to to having a relationship with them or being in connection with them so you're going to to tell them how you expect to be treated and you're going to you're going to set out those rules one at a time if you have to okay so this is just some example examples of how you set healthy boundaries all right at the end of the day setting healthy boundaries is really a continuation of step number one because when i come into my power i also become
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very self-loving so this is this is really about setting boundaries is about self-love it's about self-love and self-respect it's about you knowing that you deserve to be treated like gold and you expect that of other people if they are to stay in your life all right now if you need more help on how to create boundaries what they are and how to create them if you really suck at it at setting boundaries and you need more help with that i shot a whole video on how to set boundaries and i'll leave a link in the description box below so you can watch after this video on to step
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three of the process and that is to walk away if necessary okay so but notice this is the last step in the process you have to go through step one and two so that energy matures you set healthy boundaries and then you make a decision on whether to walk away or not so this is really a continuation of step number two it's really a continuation of setting a boundary sometimes setting a strong boundary is cutting that person out of my life and that's that that's setting a boundary also so it's a different level of setting boundaries so in step three don't be afraid of walking away from someone
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if necessary if if that's in your highest good okay now a lot of times people can have a lot of issues with this step three especially if they're dealing with toxic people that are in their family or maybe a partner so a lot of times people will say i really wish i could cut that person out of my life but it's a parent you know they're my parents i don't want to cut them out of my life i have a sense of duty to them i have a sense of obligation so all of these kinds of societal norms start to play in and they really affect our decisions and what i tell people is that
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you know regardless of what position that person has in your life whether they are family or not you're there's a mantra that i love to repeat and that and that's this that your highest sense of duty is always to yourself this is a mantra that i really hold very very very near to my heart your your biggest sense of duty is to yourself because the moment that you just completely um put yourself in a position of lack of self-love or lack of self-respect
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you're you're starting to really crumble energetically and you are not honoring yourself you're not honoring or loving yourself so regardless of what position that person occupies in your life if you intuitively feel that you're better off without them in your life then please don't be afraid of making those of taking those steps of walking away sometimes walking away is the healthiest thing that you could possibly do whether you're dealing with a toxic person that's a parent a friend a partner sometimes the healthiest and most loving thing that you can do both for yourself
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and for that person is to walk away and to cut the connection all right but again i put this here as step number three because you're first gonna focus on the empowerment piece on setting healthy boundaries on being in your power and then you make the decision on whether you want to keep this person in your life or not but here's a pro tip that i want to leave you with before we finish this video and the pro tip is that regardless of what decision you make about the toxic people in your life whether you decide to walk away cut the
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relationship or not remember never to walk away from a position of powerlessness okay so if you do walk away walk away from a position of power this is so so crucial and we already talked about why if you cut a toxic person out of your life from a position of powerlessness so if you're just running away from them sooner or later we live in a resonance-based universe which means that you can cut one toxic person out of your life but if you stay in a position of powerlessness and weak energy you're going to call forth another toxic
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person whether it's next week next month or six months from now because the universe will constantly be challenging you to come into your power to come into your energy sovereignty and they'll and the universe will keep doing that through toxic people okay so consider this an invitation that if you do have toxic people in your life remember that they're training you into your power once you come into your power then make the decision from a position of power make your decision on whether you want to keep that person in your life or not now i want to hear from you let me know
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do you struggle with toxic people in your life i want to hear all about it in the comments below and also don't forget to download the free workbook the link to that free workbook is in the description box below click here to subscribe to my youtube channel or head over to my website where you can download my popular free guided meditations and don't forget these videos that i recommended in this one that'll be great for you to continue watching alright beautiful soul i love you i'm [Music] out

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