John Plays the Kendall and Kylie Jenner Game (Ep. 1)

John Plays the Kendall and Kylie Jenner Game (Ep. 1)

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Language: English

Type: Robot

Number of phrases: 292

Number of words: 2140

Number of symbols: 9077

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00:00
hello and welcome to Kendall and Kylie my name is John Green and I'm going to attempt to play Kendall and Kylie's iPhone game this of course Kendall and Kylie Jenner two young women with whom I am actually acquainted they went to both The Fault in Our Stars and the Paper Towns premiere some very nice girls and now I'm gonna figure out I think since this woman has an exclamation point coming out of her mouth I'm gonna click on that Debbie says this is your room it isn't much but where else are you gonna find someone willing to let you rent without
00:31
cash up front I'm gonna say I don't know now this room may be small but it's not that small you can swipe to the left and right to see more of what's around don't mind the mess why don't you give it a try this appears to have been written for a third to fourth graders which come to think of it it probably was okay I'm gonna yep swipe around oh here's my clothing I love clothing can i there's my desk hi can I go to my computer I'd like to go to No okay that's cool I got a coffee pot that's nice actually you know what to have a kitchen in your room when
01:02
you're a teenager is a real blessing you got your own private laptop you got a kitchen with a coffee maker you got a lamp this woman really has nothing to complain about I think I'm quite happy with life as it is but hold on I'm gonna listen to Debbie not too shabby now about all this clutter I'd love to clean it up for you but I just had my nails done I know what that's like Debbie would you mind stashing some of these boxes how do I do that swipe to find the box tap the little pointer above the box to see what you can do and then tap okay so this is just like real life where I have to clean my children's room
01:34
tap the pointer above the box now put the Box away how do I put the Box away oh but Oh money Wow I mean I'm just gonna tell you the truth guys my kids cannot get I cannot get allowance money that quickly there's a heavier box over there that you want to stick in the claws that some actions take up more of your energy and take a few taps to get done oh I don't like the sound of that at all apparently I'm
02:05
tapping tapping tapping tapping tapping I did it I made more money thank you money delighted to have you great um Meredith I don't like to criticize you I think you're a great person and I really enjoy working with you this is the worst iPhone game I've ever played so far it's like the worst version of real life ever now this job I was telling you about on the phone isn't glamorous but it'll pay the bills I mean how else are you gonna make money well apparently just by putting away my
02:36
own clothes I guess I'm gonna say I'm going to go viral because that's certainly my intention I've never heard of anything getting a venue and getting famous from the Internet of course I do still have dial-up ha ha ha ha dial-up what is that no seriously young people don't know I wait the job next door at the van is it that you might want to change into something a little less drenched in sweat from listening those boxes ok then I'm gonna go and I'm gonna put on a different top yes ooh oh well
03:09
this is fun now the game got better all right so Maris did you buy these clothes for me oh I have to so I get better clothes as I move up the ladder but I quite like that that top and then I like just Jean no not capri pants just just high-waisted jeans yes don't you what do you think Meredith Meredith thinks it's cool what about hair nope I
03:38
think that's the right length ooh ooh purple and purple how do I do that under color oh well what kind of face do I want I want mm mm that I want i how do i ah how do I change my lips ooh ooh that's dangerous yes what do you think Meredith is it - am I making too much of a statement is it a lot of color it's a lot of color no I think I look good I
04:14
completed a goal congratulations me I made some money by getting dressed I'll tell you what okay in Kylie and Kendall's world it really is easy to make money um I'm sure I'll find it yeah that's fine okay and we're off swipe left and hit the exit button okay we're gonna go out into the world and I'm gonna get famous from the internet Oh where's the new girl up are you Debbie's new tenant yes I am good I'm in a bit of a hurry what was your name again my name is yeah Loretta that is correct
04:45
it's crazy that they knew that right well or not I hope you're ready to work oh I'm ready to work what do you want me to start with styling nails what oh no I want you just sweeping up and doing some reception work you'll be making minimum wage ish oh that's great so we're violating labor laws oh yeah I may and if I find this game kind of like politically troubling um but I will say like the graphics all right hi Emily it's me Loretta don't mind Greta she's
05:17
old anyway you know how sometimes people say that I act old that I act like a like an old person trying to be hip and cool to the kids doesn't this whole game feel that way a little bit doesn't it feel like but then is me playing this game just another example that I don't know it's too meta for me at this point um cool can I help I love helping let's head inside I'll show you around great I already like you because you've got that like dead heart emoji yeah I want to go inside the salon yeah yeah oh
05:50
there we go hi I like the diamond ring oh hey it's me loretta from earlier um restocking or whatever but I was actually gonna make a style video to post online would you help with me I'm actually I don't want to brag Emily but I'm really good at youtube so let's do it all right yeah I'll set up my phone's camera and we'll get started I'm ready okay let's do it didn't dinner doesn't dinner dinner dinner no no no find and tap the pointers and try to get as many stars as you can before time runs out like that
06:21
one what that one that one what about this one about this one what am I doing here oh I just have to hit the buttons over and over again this is not challenging the only the only skill part is is tapping I just have to tap I just have to tap tap tap tap tap tap well now I'm getting nervous because tapping isn't that easy what if I'm not what if what if they don't think I'm a good tapper eyeliner oh man I'm killing it lots of texture
06:54
absolutely how did that how did I do you've completed not quite a day job congratulations this is the easiest iPhone game I've ever played I feel like a genius I've reached the next level I can now travel to Malibu whoo oh wow look at all those K's dang dang I'm rich I got so many diamonds I think that's the best one I've done I'm going together good I'm going to post right now you've got to edit it Emily you
07:26
can't just like you can't just tap tap tap I mean there's you gotta at least open up premiere what's your news er name oh my username is also Loretta as it happens that's crazy at Loretta cool added you you can check your feed to see what friends are posting about you you know like any social media feed I think actually I think I I used at first I thought this game was for ten year olds but now I think it's for grandmother's it's like an amazing amazing game for grandmothers that like teaches them how to use Twitter is you know like
07:56
Twitter's got this huge problem where they're not getting any new users because nobody can figure out how to use it but I think if you just play the Kendall and Kylie game it just sort of like works out for you I've ten followers dang ten followers I've got to figure it out man Emily what's going on with you you can totally get doubt thousands of followers just by posting cool stuff what's the point of having followers does it keep me from the eventual absolute dissolution that accompanies
08:26
death or not Emily Emily Emily will it do anything about the yawning Canyon of oblivion that awaits me Emily okay I'll just ask you what's up then I promised my friend Perry that I'd pick up some concert tickets for him the concerts tonight and I forgot I just have to pick them up down by the pier oh yeah you should go get them fine yeah absolutely watch the store for like ten minutes yeah of course I can wait what someone comes in just ask them to wait I'll be right back cool no problem later
08:58
oh oh it's Aubrey Madison can I just get like a little bit of service here hi how can I help you my name's Loretta I need my bangs trimmed and I will literally die if I don't get this done Oh God suddenly the stakes have gone way up what was previously just like a pretty chill game about making makeup tutorial videos is suddenly Aubrey Madison's life at risk um well Kendall and Kylie be there will they why would you randomly guess that Kendall and Kylie Jenner would be there whatever every second I waste on you I could be live I could be live streaming
09:31
well I get ready wow so this this in this world like life is all about gaining followers and live-streaming it's only a few minutes did I stutter I don't have time I'm yeah she's got to be fair Loretta she's going to die if we don't Trang her bang trim trim her bangs do you even know who I am I'm gonna say no my name is Aubrey Madison and since you're obviously new here my mom practically owns this place Greta owns my mom owes my mom like so much money
10:02
and when I tell her how badly I've been treated she will shut this useless place down uh-oh besides I wouldn't want my hair done by someone who dresses like some house way from Arizona I resent that I quite like my high-waisted jeans wait wait a second I'd like to follow you outside ma'am and I just I can I can trim your bangs I can do it wait Aubrey come back what what is going on here why is Miss Madison's kid in such a huff well it wasn't my fault exactly I didn't you don't understand I would was ready
10:33
to trim her bangs yeah it wasn't misunderstanding no boy I'm sorry but you know III could have trimmed her bangs it's just that Emily no now suddenly it's like Grand Theft Auto you get yourself into one little problem and suddenly you're in so deep that there's no way getting out until you have 40,000 followers and you've killed Franklin all right Meredith I think I'm gonna have to play without watching for a little while but this has been a very fun introduction to Kylie and Kendall's
11:04
video game for your iPhone which you can get on your phone is it free oh it's free well in that case I think it's a pretty good bargain um I've enjoyed this and I am unfortunately going to go play right now by myself until I have like a hundred thousand dollars and I'll update you guys on what happens then thank you for watching let me know if there are any other iPhone games you'd like me to play best wishes

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